Well here I sit, I have just read 2 or 3 e-mails from players in my Crew (or guild if you would call it that). 1 of my friends built a great Facebook Group Page for the Animation RPG, so I have been trying to keep the 35 members I have in the loop on anything and everything Animation RPG. It used to be typical that when I announce a Game as DM my spots would fill up in 48 hours or less but ever since the group was built and I tried to finalize and revamp the system everything has changed.
Just a few months ago the group page was swarming with activity, seemed like the oldest players were gunning to get a piece of the newest players, and now it's like listening to an empty field without even the sound of crickets. Perhaps RPG is now lost on some people because they outgrew it or maybe they have too many responsibilities now - I guess I'm the only one who can work from a calendar, maybe that's simply because I am a business owner - who knows?
I gave everyone involved a way out, already as I type this letter the members count has dropped to 34... oh well. I just don't know what happened, I tried my hardest to make something great to keep us all together and entertained but I guess it only really mattered to me. It FEELS like everyone else has moved on and I am the only one who forgot to take the next step. I had like the worst day ever... work, kid, family, RPG, all of it suffering... I guess I needed the RPG more then my group did, however as I have said before you can't possibly be a DM if you have no players, which oddly enough... I still have players, it just FEELS like I have no players.
It occurs to me now that people online really only respond to NEGATIVE stuff, I hate negative stuff, I try to add POSITIVE stuff to the INET world. Anyway I am so confused and irritated right now I would just love to put my fist through the wall, however that would just wake my family up. Perhaps the game will sell once this whole copyright goes through. Maybe the RPG world for me will continue... here's hoping.
Perhaps the world of adults will still view me as being just as silly caring about a Game System, one that people are supposedly supposed to outgrow. It's hurtful to realize that for awhile there I had built and created something that mattered to people and had made an impact on their lives, guess Not, apparently it was just a stupid thought in my head.